


Highclassed whorable

by Teakany



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Attempted Kidnapping, M/M, Mentions of incest, Prostitution, Recreational Drug Use, mentions of past underage, mentions of pedophila, prucan fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-11-14
Packaged: 2018-03-31 08:52:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 20,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3971701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teakany/pseuds/Teakany
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Matthew had run away with his older brother at a young age, going down a road he couldn't turn around on. everything was fine until Mattie grew up too much and Al lost interest. After he was ditched by his older brother/lover, Matthew had to find a new way to survive. and he's been doing a great job so far, thank you very much. but then Alfred shows up and throws a wrench in everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> more tags will be added as I go, and the rating will possibly change

He dragged back on the cigarette gratefully, the rush of nicotine filling his brain. As he exhaled his hand raked through blonde curls tipping his head back and easing his eyes to the small scrap of sky that could be seen from between the buildings. Cold wind rushed through the alley and bit his exposed flesh, but it felt good, soon enough he would be on that stage, parading himself around and roasting under the bright lights.

It was all too soon that a head popped out of the door that was down a flight of concrete stairs to the basement of the building "curtain call in twenty Mattie, best get set up, you know what a bitch Ludwig is about timing" Matthew sighed and nodded at the blonde women standing by the door. He flicked the half finished smoke to the ground and pushed off the wall, following her inside.

Almost everyone in the change room was female. There were a grand total of three men in this particular house, and one was the stage manager. The only other guy up for grabs was the stage manager's brother, Gilbert, but he played things a little different, going for the more decidedly masculine approach. Matthew tipped a bit closer to feminine, so they usually attracted different types, but both men were still usually swamped with requests after the weekly show, they really should bring in more boys. Matthew wasn't about complain of course, It simply meant next to no competition for clientele, which meant more money.

House was a fairly loose term for what this was. It was built more like an apartment building with a bar in the basement and was all owned by the same man and utilized by the staff there. Once you came into the door there was a green room, the walls lined with lit vanities, costume racks all over the place with hanger that held barely there costumes.

Matthew walked to his table, rolling his shoulders. He sat on the seat in front of it and reached for a small cardboard box, opening the lid he removed a bottle of white pills. Shaking out two Vicodin out of it, he placed them on his tongue, using the glass of cheap red wine that sat in front of him to wash it down. That would get him through part of the night… he grabbed another two pills and slipped them into the small pouch sewed into the shorts he wore, for later.

Leaning forward he checked his eyeliner, the deep black lining brought out the unnatural violet hue of his eyes in a stark contrast, they were a big selling point. His hands moved to his hair, gathering the top parts and tying them back with a black ribbon. This left the bottom half of his curls just brushing his shoulders while keeping the rest out of his face. He sighed as the one stubborn curl remained in his face, there was no point in trying to tame it back… it was determined. Finally he swiped a wand across his lips, staining them just slightly redder, nothing unnatural looking, only enough to make them look bitten and excited.

Once he decided his face was perfect he stood up and walked to the set of three full length mirrors. his eyes slid down his body. Around his neck was a black leather collar, a star shaped flower made of purple gems sat just below the collar, dangling from it. Matthew's torso was bare otherwise, the expanse of his lightly toned chest and stomach only interrupted by the glint of his belly button piercing, the matching purple gem catching the light as he moved. He ran his hands down the pale, unnaturally hairless skin and smiled, eyes catching the cuffs that matched the collar were on either wrist, a strap on each attaching to his middle fingers.

His eyes continued down, hanging off his hips, just barely there, sat a pair tight black shorts, it was like a second skin. The material was hardly even covering his ass, if he bent, or twisted just the right way… he twisted and smirked at the glimpse of flesh peeking out. Attached to the leather shorts were garter straps, they held the fishnet stockings up where they needed to be. the netting covered half of the milky white flesh of his thighs that seemed to go on forever. Finally finishing off his look were a pair of purple pumps, they raised his heels, shaping his calves and ass in a graceful way. Yes, he thought as he twisted about looking at all angles, he looked fuckable. A perfect balance of feminine and masculine that reflected his graceful build.

"You're up in 10 Matthew" came the deep voice behind him. He looked lazily at the German stage manager and offered a nod and a smile. Rolling his head back, he gave a quiet moan, he could feel the Vicodin start to creep into his system, by the time he was on that stage, it would be fully set. It was easier with the extra help, showing yourself off, offering yourself up to the clientele. He heard 'number two, lollydoll', a girl in a pink lolita dress with short pig tails went out. She'd get snapped up quick enough. sick fucks. he chuckled to himself.

Matthew went back to his seat, sitting and letting his eyes slip close, losing himself and enjoying as the drug took him slowly. He could feel the energy he lacked before entering, any aches disappeared, he let out a satisfied sigh and opened his eyes, a smile on his lips. Oh yes, this was going to be fun. He was going to leave them begging, fighting over him.

He had lost track of time when he heard "Nightshade, you're up next, get in your damn position" he loved his stage name. The beautiful yet deadly nightshades, almost the exact shade of his eyes. when he started he was called Goldielocks… but really it was a bit too girly for him. Toeing the line for his image or not, he was still a guy. nightshade was a flower, that was close enough to feminine. A delicate little flower, that could kill you...

Matthew bounced to standing and strutted over to Ludwig. Flashing a flirty smile at the angry looking stage manager he giggled "yeah yeah Luddy I'm here, I wouldn't be late for a call. I'd much rather my panties were in a bunch than yours… preferably as you ripped them off me " he purred, trailing a hand over the well muscled chest, giving a wink. He smirked as the german's cheeks flushed slightly with the returned eye roll. poor guy, constantly harassed and it was part of the job. Wrangling this group was probably exhausting. Maybe he should feel bad for teasing, but It was too much fun!

Matthew stood beside the curtain and waited. The stage was bare except for a pole. They weren't there to strip of course, no no, this part was just to show off what was for sale. Let the customers have a preview of the personalities and the way the bodies they would own for a night could move. Basically, Matthew was a whore.

There was a show once a week, clients would come in, watch, then bid on whomever they wanted, six nights available, so if you couldn't get in with your favourite on Sunday? well there was always Wednesday. One night a week was generously blacked out for each of the performers, a personal night. Aka a night where they could rest up. They all slept during the day, but you needed mental rest for this work.

The voice rang over the speakers,speaking over the intro to a song "Next up, number four, Nightshade." Matthew let his eyes fill with lust and play, the beat of 'I want your bite' playing as he walked with the music, the bass drowning out the click the heels made as he made his way quickly to the pole. Without a second of hesitation he launched up at it, suspending himself high and twisting his way around. The remainder of the song was spent twirling, throwing his body around on the pole. contorting himself into nearly impossible positions, hanging impossibly upside down, reaching out while barely holding on with his thighs, all the while teasing the audience with looks of longing and playfulness. He got lost in the music, the movements and the reactions fueling his high. He loved show night.

Then, within minutes, it was over, he walked off stage, sweat glistening all over his body, chest heaving just a little harder. He liked the feeling, the hard work he put his body through, causing exactly the right reactions. He would see at least one after effect later tonight.

He smiled sweetly at the next in line. "Think you can beat my numbers tonight Gil?"

The Albino man flashed a smirk, red eyes glittering "With ease Birdie, who could resist this much awesome?". Gilbert brushed a hand down his well built body, unlike Matthews clear smooth skin, Gils was covered in tattoos and scars. A little rough and tumble, screaming bad boy, but It was most certainly a pleasant sight.

Matthew rolled his eyes and chuckled. He was kind of curious as to how that cockiness translated to the rooms. "Number 5," Gilbert muttered 'meters' between his brothers breaths "Silver wolf" was called and out he went. 'bruises and bite marks' blasting over the speakers. Matthew stood to the side, watching the beginning his show by leaning back against the pole, reaching back behind him to pull himself up almost to the top. Violet eyes scanned his muscles in appreciation before he turned away with a thoughtful hum.

He walked back into the dressing area smiling brightly at the girls around him, complimenting them, and accepting praise all the same, but he furrowed his brow in confusion when the lolita dressed Erika informed him he had a visitor. Who would be visiting him? Unless… he walked to the back door and pulled it open, the venom oozing from his eyes and dripping from his voice "What do you want Alfred"


	2. Chapter 2

“Awe Mattie… don’t be like that.” the predatory eyes looked him up and down “Nice outfit” 

“Yeah, too bad it’s a bit too old for you eh?” he bit, “What the fuck do you want Alfred? Don’t you have somewhere to be? Some kid to offer candy and haul to the other side of the country or something?” 

“Ouch, bro! I’m hurt! You know you were my special little…” he paused and fingered the charm at Matthews throat “Flower” he trailed the fingers down Matthew’s chest making him shudder. “Can’t I just stop in to see my little bro?”

“If you're not answering the question, I’m leaving. I have work Alfred.” Matthew went to close the door but a hand stopped it. 

“Okay fine! I need a place to crash… “ 

Matthew chewed on his tongue… This was killing his buzz. He walked toward his station, reaching in his pocket and took out his house keys. He went back to the door and tossed them at his brother

“Don’t touch my stash, stay out of my room, and I swear to god Alfred, you bring anyone there I will turn you in myself you asshole.” 

Alfred gave that blinding boyish smile he used to charm anyone, including Matthew no matter how many times he stabbed him in the back. “Thanks little bro! You’re the best”

“Yeah, what fucking ever Alfred. Get out of my face and shut the fuck up in the morning. I have to sleep during the day.” 

“Well, when are you going to be home and not sleeping?” he pouted. It was amazing how he could flip from perv to puppy… 

“With any luck not until Friday” 

That smirk reappeared “Maybe I could buy you for a night… get some bonding time?”

Matthew raised and eyebrow and looked him up and down haughtily. “You couldn’t afford me” with that he closed the door in his brother’s stupid pouting face.

\-----

Matthew smirked at the numbers. He had paid off his debt two years before, so now a larger chunk of this was his. Plenty to pay the bills and restock his stash. He didn’t eat a terrible amount, so most of it would go into the growing savings account. He wasn’t stupid, he knew this job had an age limit. He was 21, so he had a good few more years, but he had money tucked away so he wasn’t going to suddenly be completely broke after. 

Gilbert smirk appeared in his mirror, Matthew smiled without looking back and held out his hand. The Albino slipped a piece of paper like the one Matthew had been holding into his hand. Violet eyes scanned the numbers side by side and gave a half smile and a shrug “I beat you out for Thursday and Saturday… but the total goes to you.” he passed the paper back to the cocky looking man. “Guess your gettin’ Pancakes this week” 

The man laced hands around Matthew’s chest and nuzzled against his curls “Is that all I get?” Matthew gasped as the teeth hit his ear. 

He wiggled away laughing “Yeah yeah, warm bed, someone to cuddle. God you’re so fucked, Gil…” he pushed Gilbert away, but not until he turned his head up and gave him a chaste kiss. the red eyed man smirked before he turned to trot to his own table. 

Gilbert and Matthew had been running a system for ages. If Matthews numbers were better, Gilbert needed to supply wurst for the week, making it so Matthew didn’t have to cook much. If Gilbert won, he got pancakes. Of course this usually meant the german stayed at his house. Getting away from his brother and scoring a warm body to sleep next too. 

Once or twice the two had fucked, but really, in their line of work it wasn’t as thrilling a prospect. Both were too programmed to react in certain ways.. it just felt like extra work. However affection was warmly welcomed. Not receiving it from clients, a body to curl up next to on the couch, lips to kiss gently, someone to nuzzle against as you fell asleep… those were worth it. To be completely honest, Gilbert barely spent time at his own place anymore. 

He frowned as the thought occurred to him. Alfred was going to be there. Oh god. He went to go an inform Gilbert that they would not be alone, but he’d already gone up to his client's room. Fuck. Okay, next best thing, Ludwig… 

“Luddy!” he called as he walked around the green room. He tracked the large blonde down finally “If your brother finishes first, can you tell him to wait for me, don’t just go to my house. My stupid brother is there and I’d rather not deal with that mess when I get there” 

The stage manager sighed and nodded. “Ja, I’ll let him know… you're in room B2, go before you're late." he said irritably.

\------

Matthew sat in front of his vanity and wiped away the black eyeliner as he waited for Gilbert to appear. He had finished up first, much earlier than expected really. Most of the staff got off at the same time, but between room numbers and lingering clients... Matthews eyes grazed over the soft pink marks on his neck and shoulders. his client had been so timid, must have been his first time paying for it or something. He reflected for a moment, no definitely was. The man had asked Matthew if he was okay as he got redressed at the end. Usually Matt was used for the entire night, that’s what they paid for, but this guy had told him he could leave an entire hour before the clock ran out. 

“Sure there’s nothing else I can do for you honey?” Matthew had asked sweetly, tilting his head to the side. 

“N-no no… I… er… thank you.. I’m fine… thank you…” his face bright red. 

Matthew had felt kinda bad for him. So shook up. Though, he knew he had enjoyed himself… no one who doesn’t makes that much noise. 

He was finishing his other eye when the flash of white went across his mirror “Gil! I’m over here!” and so the explanation began

\----

The whole way back to Matt's apartment Gilbert was in a bad mood. He was in the passenger seat, dark blue hoody unzipped halfway down his chest, showing off the bare skin, a pair of baggy sweat pants covering his legs, resting his sneakers on Matthews dash. He glared out the window, orange light of the rising sun made it seem like he was glowing. honestly he looked far too tempting as he sat there... And bitched, making him slightly less sexy.

“Why the hell is he here?”

“He needed a place to crash”

“And you just let him?!” 

Matthew sighed and shrugged. Tt wasn't the first time Al had come around over the years, and Matthew was always a push over for him. Gilbert hated it.

“Shoulda just told him to fuck off”

The red eyed man had been around when Alfred had dumped Matthew off five years ago. It had happened to a good number of the girls, so it wasn’t exactly a secret. The owner kept in touch with plenty of people like Alfred, offered to take the kids off them once they were no longer… desirable. He’d buy them, and the unwanted, developed teens would work off their debt. At the end they could leave, or they could stay and get a larger cut. It wasn’t shocking that most stayed, under-educated, scared to go home, little to no self worth, desperate for approval, no real skills outside the bedroom… It was the perfect trap. 

Gilbert had been one of the ones who came willingly though, he and his little brother had run away from a bad situation. For the first few years, Gil had just supported Ludwig, but soon his brother proved to have the skill set that Lars looked for in a stage manager. dedicated, organized, not soft on anyone, but good control over their temper… also untempted by the staff. Matthew had been the Albino's first Pedo reject experience, and Gilbert had taken a special interest in making sure he was kept safe. 

“Please just don’t start a fight okay? I’m exhausted and I’d really like to sleep today, not play referee…”

“Fine. But if he says anything to upset you even a little…” Matthew nodded, he could only ask so much. 

As soon as they got in the door, Gil had dragged himself down to the bedroom, sparing only a glare at the blonde who was situated on the couch, just waking up. 

“I’ll be there in a sec Gil, thirsty.” He walked to the Kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it.

"Who's that and why is he here? I thought this was bro time bro!" Whined his brothers voice

"My friend from work. He stays over sometimes, it's nice to have someone I want to be around here. Also, not bro time. this is, 'I need a place to hide so I'm going to force my presence on my brother' time” he corrected coolly

"But why does he need to be here Mattie~? I could keep you company in bed." Alfred wiggled his eyebrows

"Because Alfred, no part of me wants to be that affectionate, scratched that… No part of me wants to be affectionate at all, with my big brother" his voice was a little sharper in warning

"That's not what you use to sa-" he started in that annoying singsong voice and Matthew saw red.

He tore across the room, leaving the water on the counter, and shoved Alfred back on the couch, one knee on his stomach holding him down along with a hand on his shoulder. The other fist held back ready to connect if need be "One more word you sick fuck and I will make sure you're nice and bloody when the cops pick you up." he growled quietly so as not to alert the already angry Albino in the other room.

Alfred held up his hands in surrender. Matthew held his glare and slowly rose, turning to head to the bedroom. Alfred just had to mutter “Someone's PMSing…”

Crack

Alfred landed back on the couch and his hand went to his jaw “Ouch! What the fuck bro!” 

“learn to shut the fuck up already Alfred. I’m going to bed. If you're too loud I’ll send Gilbert out.” he said as he walked to the bedroom shaking out his hand. “He hits harder”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why do I love this dynamic? I have no idea... but I doooo!


	3. Chapter 3

Matthew sighed contented in Gilbert's hold, the closeness was fantastic. However now, no matter how comfortable he was in the arms around him, he couldn’t fall asleep. Stupid Alfred… Why couldn’t he just stay gone?! 

“You okay birdie?” came the sleepy voice against his hair. 

Matthew jumped, he hadn’t realized Gilbert was awake “Oh I’m sorry hun, did I wake you up?” 

Gilbert let out a little groan as he tightened his grip, snuggling closer “Mmhmm. You're all tense.” 

Matthew turned his head awkwardly and shifted, Gilbert's arms loosening for him reluctantly, and faced his more-than-friend so he could give the man a kiss in apology “I’m sorry Gil. Just a hell of a day. Go back to sleep mkay?”

Gilbert shifted onto his back, pulling Matthew to his chest. The smaller man curled against larger, using his chest as a pillow comfortably. A hand raked through his curls knowingly and slowly Matthew relaxed. It was nice to have someone who knew how you ticked. Matthews eyes closed and soon both men were peacefully asleep. 

\------

 

Matthew was in the kitchen the next afternoon making pancakes. Usually this was done in nothing but a t-shirt but Alfred was on the couch watching, bored as ever, while Matt ignored his existence. Sweat pants had joined the outfit. 

Gil came out stretching, his bare torso covered in fresh bright red marks from work the night before. So he'd gotten a biter. Matthew smiled up at him as he entered the kitchen, pale arms wrapping around the little blonde and kissing his neck "Morning Birdie, coffee?" 

"Mmm, yes please" he turned and caught the albinos mouth before he turned to pour two mugs of the wonderful black liquid. 

"So is he your boyfriend or something?" Came Alfred’s obnoxious voice. 

Gil sighed, he had obviously been trying to pretend the man wasn’t there. He turned with a raised eyebrow and frowned in irritation "Nosy fucker for a free loader, aren't you"

Al shrugged "Was just a question"

"And If I was? What you gonna do about it you fucking perv?" the coffee went down, knuckles white and Gils eyes were full of hate. 

Matthews face went into his hands as he leaned over the counter with a groan. God damnit, it was too early for this shit…He stood again and leaned back against the counter, watching the pair, just in case. 

“I don’t know how I’d feel about my little brother being with someone like you that way” Alfred look mirrored Gils, voice picking up its own aggression.

Matthew could see Gilbert muscles coil and tense like he was ready to launch himself “Are you seriously fucking judging me asswipe?! At least I don’t like to fuck little boys!” 

Flinching at this Matthew pushed off the counter and moved to lay a hand on the tattooed bicep "Gil, stop." he said gently, he then turned to his brother smiling in a not so friendly way and started with enough acid to melt the counter tops, "Al I fuck people for a living too remember? Maybe cut the damned relationship topic before something gets broken, you know, like your face." 

Alfred scowled at his brother but rolled his eyes and sat back down. “Whatever you say Mattie” he grumbled

Gil glared at the older brother wildly “Please… Just… Just one hit” 

Matthew sighed. “Come on Gilly, we both know it wouldn’t be just one.” He whined pouting, trying for humor “The pancakes are gonna go to burn if I have to pull you off of him before he dies! Think of the pancakes! Plus you’ll get blood on my carpet and it’s a bitch to get out.” 

Matthew slipped between him and the counter, pinning himself comfortably in the process, and slipped his arms around Gilbert's waist. “Just forget him” he murmured placing soft kisses along the pale collar bone “For me?” he could feel the muscles relax slightly as Gilbert sighed. 

Strong arms returned the hold while lips pressed to his forehead. “Just for you” 

 

\------

Gilbert and Matthew hadn’t stayed very long past breakfast, slipping into street clothing for the space of time they had to fill before work. When it wasn’t a show day, their shifts didn’t start until ten pm. You would be in the room from ten until four, then you go home, sleep and come back. 

Most days Matthew and Gilbert just stuck around the house until they had to go in, but with Alfred at the house, that wasn’t really an appealing idea. So, instead they decided to check out the city. They strolled through the mall, Matthew bought a few essentials from the drugstore, wax strips, floss, shampoo. He hadn’t been in a while, so all in all it was good timing. 

Next they hit the park. Gilbert buying them each a Popsicle from the vendor. He smiled like a proud five year old when he handed it to the blonde who rolled his eyes and smiled in return. The two linked arms and walked down the path chatting and devouring the sugary ice. To anyone walking past they probably just looked like a normal couple. 

The pair had eventually wandered their way to work, getting there an hour before shift to get set up. They would need to grab a cab home after work. Matthew was already done getting ready, sitting in his chair with his heeled feet up on the table, all decked out in the requested outfit, a black teddy, apparently this one swung more to the feminine. He was staring at his nails wondering if he should paint them purple when a voice interrupted his thoughts

"Nightshade! Fresh meat, looks like you'll have a bit more competition. Show 'im around" 

Matt tilted his head back, Lars was standing in the green room, his hand on a teenage boys shoulder, same intimidating smile-free look as always. Matthews eyes skidded over, taking in the new boy from his upside down perspective. He looked about 16, short straight brown hair, big hazel eyes, lovely olive skin. He'd be popular. A nice off set for the two paler men too Matthew offered a smile "Hey there kid, what’s your name?" 

The kid glared at him, "why do you care you bastard?" he muttered, face red. He pulled away from Lars, who uninterested in the conversation, merely turned and left. Matthew could hear his foot steps on the stairs back up to his office. He was never in the green room long, the chaos bugged him, neat freak weirdo. 

Matthew closed his eyes and sighed. He tipped his head back up and twisted around so he was sitting backwards on his chair, arms folded over the back and chin resting on top of them "Because I think it'd be nice to call you more then 'Hey kid' or whatever stage name you wind up with. But here I'll start, Name's Matthew, they call me Nightshade when I work." 

The boy eyed him for a minute "Like a fucking lamp?" Matthew raised an eyebrow pursing his lips. The kid turned red again,"Lovino... But i'm not going to be here long, Antonio is coming back for me." 

Matthew gave him a sympathetic smile. "Is he now?" she said softly as he stood "Well then, I suppose we should make this a quick tour..."

"That's not nice Mattie" the lolita girl Erika frowned at him as she passed by towards her spot "Letting him believe that is just going to make it worse when he realizes it’s not happening." her eyes sparkled with tears. She had only been here eight months. Once she turned seventeen she too had been dumped off and the fact still stung. He offered her a sad smile and she turned, suddenly desperately in need of her vanity... Or more likely the Xanax she popped like candy. 

Matthew looked towards Lovino who was now twenty shades darker and offered a slight shrug. "They all say they're coming back, it's only temporary, they just need the money and they'll get it all and come back in a week, but they never do." The boy was shaking and looking down now. 

"Sorry kid" he said sincerely "We have a pretty short shelf life with people like that. Once you grow up, you don't have anything for 'em anymore. It's not so bad here." 

"You’re a fucking liar! Toni wouldn't just leave me here!" 

Matthew shrugged "You can believe that if you want Lovino, but Erika's right, it's just gonna make it harder. Now, shall we?" Matthew watched him for a second, waiting for more of a fight, but the kid just nodded. Thank god.

"Really Lovino, you're lucky" he said loudly smirking as they drew closer to Gils table "The guy who showed me around when I got here was a total dick!" Gil smirked as they passed by and Matthew squeaked as his ass got slapped.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh god flash backs! yup, some back story goin on.

Being around Lovino must have unburied something for Matthew, because his dreams took him back

Matthew's first day had been burned into his memory. Alfred had driven them the eight hours back to one of the safe houses they had bunked at when they had first run. The brothers stood in an extremely well cleaned office, it’s condition contrasting the dilapidated looking building. Alfred’s ‘old friend’ was sitting behind the desk with his fingers tented. The man he now knew as Lars, was terrifying looking to the very sheltered sixteen year old. He was a lot taller then Alfred, with gravity defying ash blonde hair, a scar sat above his blazing green eye, though they were at the time bloodshot making the green more intense. He didn’t smile once while they were there, and the pipe in his mouth was always between his lips. 

"Mattie, I gotta leave you here for a while" Violet eyes opened wide in panic, his breathing suddenly faster as he clung to his brothers sleeve.

"What? But why?! Is it because I didn't wear the wig when we went to that store?! Cause I'll be better I promise! I'll even dye my hair if you want!" he was desperate, tears stinging his eyes.

Alfred’s arms went around Matthew holding him close and pressing a kiss to his forehead. "No Mattie! It's not that I promise! It's just... I gotta hide for a while, and It'll be safer for you here. Just a few weeks I promise! I'll come back when I have some place for us to go okay?" 

"... Okay" Matthew murmured, unable to think of anyway to argue this. His desire to please his big brother overriding his need to be near him.

"But you gotta be good alright?! Do what Lars asks you, don't back talk and pull your weight." Alfred hugged him closer and nuzzled his nose against the curls "Just earn your keep for a few weeks and I'll be back to get you."

Matthew buried his head in his brother’s shoulder fingers digging in as he clung. Not sure if he was telling the truth or not, but he nodded.

Standing with Lars Matthew had watched as Al got in the car and drove away. Tears were rolling down his cheeks as the scary man had taken him down to the basement for his first tour. 

 

\------

Matthew groaned and opened his eyes. Why was he so sore? He shifted his face to look at the clock. 3am… But wait.. That wasn’t his clock, and it was still work hours? Quickly he turned his head back over and met with a mirroring pair of violet eyes. 

The large Russian smiled at him “Morning little flower” he chuckled. 

“Wh-what happened?” he sat up and groaned. His throat hurt… Oh yeah… He blinked a few times. Ivan was a regular and he had a certain set of needs. One of those needs included his hands around Matthews pretty little throat, which had on occasion lead to passing out. “Mmmm right” he muttered god his head hurt. Not just his head either, half his body ached. The man's needs went beyond simple breath play. Sometimes Matthew wondered if he needed a whore or just a punching bag with a hole cut in it. He’d probably hate Ivan if the man didn’t tip so damn generously. Still, he silently thanked the vicodin gods...

“So cute when you wake up” the man's hand was on his face. Survival instincts screamed at him to pull away, but his trained reaction pushed him to lean into the touch and rub his face against it lightly, flashing large violet eyes full of innocence, a blush spreading across his face. This caused the smile on the larger man to widen.

Matthew had worked hard to perfect blushing on command, but it was worth it for how often he used it. Most of the men who bought him wanted a sweet, innocent little freak. An angel who could blow their minds then turn bright red when they told him he was amazing.  
“You still have an hour left” Matthew murmured as he caught Ivan’s hand, moving it to his mouth and trailing light kisses along the reddened knuckles. “Is there anything else you want to do?” he smirked lightly. 

Ivan hummed and brought his other hand to hover over Matthew’s face. “ There are many things I would like to do flower, but face is off limits still, da?” 

Matthew offered an apologetic smile “Sorry sugar, house policy, have to stay pretty so no damage to the face” thank you Lars. There were a lot of things guests were allowed to do to you, but damage to the face or severe damage, such as broken bones, would get you banned. His merchandise needed to be able to work and pull a profit. A broken nose brought in less clients, and a broken rib meant an out of commission whore for a while.

Ivan sighed sadly before shifting so he was hovering over the blonde, a gentle shove sent Matthew crashing back into pillows with a giggle. “Not to worry little flower, I’m sure there are things we can do to pass the time…”

 

_____

Matthew trudged into the green room only a lacy pair of panties and the heels to provide coverage. Fuck decency, the teddy had been shredded. Also part of Ivan’s usual routine. 

Not even hesitating Matthew walked to Gilbert’s station, leaning over and draping himself over the pale man. “Take m’home” he slurred, absolutely exhausted. 

Gil hissed as he looked at Matthews skin, bruises blossoming. “Carlos or Sadik?” he asked with a sympathetic smile.

“Ivan” he groaned burying his face in the man’s neck. 

“Did he make you pass out again” his voice sounded strained, a hand reached back to lace through Matthews curls 

“Mmhmm. Just once this time though” his words muffled. Gilbert shook his head. 

Both men's attention was suddenly captured by a whimper. Matthew looked towards it and winced he had completely forgotten about the little Italian boy who had apparently been asleep by the costumes. He stood up and grabbed Gilbert’s house coat from the back of the chair, moving to cover the marks. He offered a smile “Hey Lovino, didn’t Lars get you a bed yet?” his voice soft, like talking to a wounded animal. 

“W-Who did that?!…” he stammered at first. Matthew felt bad for the kid, it must be pretty terrifyi- “What kind of sick fuck does that?! What kind of fucking place is this lampshade?! You must be a complete fucking idiot to stay here!” and with that, he ran off. 

Matthew and Gilbert stared at his retreating form then looked at each other. “Well… Isn’t he going to be easy to sell” Matthew muttered exhaustively. Gilbert was started snickering. “What?” Matthew asked furrowing his brows at the kesesesese sound. 

“Lampshade” he muttered before dissolving into laughter. 

Matthew rolled his eyes. “Whatever jackass, you’re paying for the cab, lets just go.” 

____

Matthew was in a bad mood this time. Alfred had tried to act the part of protective big brother when he saw the bruises. It pissed him off, since when did he fucking care. That’s what Matthew had thrown in his face anyway. This was by far not the first time he’d come home like this, hell he’d come home in worse condition! He sighed in irritation as a flash of the first time he’d been left in this condition came unbidden. 

\----

Matthew tore from the house crying, he had a jacket wrapped tightly around him, as he dashed down the block for the payphone he had seen. Tripping over the low heels he was wearing he crashed into the booth. He winced as he picked himself up, everything hurt! 

Taking a quarter from the pocket of his jacket he slipped it in the hole, dialing a familiar number. “Please pick up… Please please please” he muttered as it rang, most the time Alfred's phone would go to voicemail, he prayed it wasn’t one of those times. He was about to give up when a voice answered 

“‘llo?” came a sleepy answer

“Alfie! It’s Mattew, please you have to come get me right now!”

“Whoa whoa” there was a groan as Alfred must have been sitting up. “ What's wrong Mattie?”

“T-They h-h-hurt me… He h-h-hit m-me I’m all c-covered in marks! P-Please Al! It’s been three months, you were suppose to be here already!” He sobbed shakily into the receiver. Pleading for rescue. He just wanted to go home!

“Oh god Mattie! I’m sorry bro! But… I mean, You have a roof over your head right?” Matthew froze as Alfred continued “ You have food to eat, extra cash… It’s not so bad.” a sudden turn in the young boys stomach threatened to empty it’s contents.

“Al… Just come get me okay?” he tried weakly. 

“Look kid… I can’t. It’s just… Fuck...I tried to be gentle with this, but ya gotta stop calling Mattie. I just can’t do this anymore okay? My feelings changed, I mean you're still my bro, but…” he trailed off

Matthew felt dizzy, was he breathing? He wasn’t sure “W-What? Al? What do you… No.. Please Al-”

“I’m sorry it had to be this way, I mean you know-” Matthew slammed the phone down. Tears of embarrassment and hopelessness falling down his cheeks. He ripped the heels off his feet and slunk down to the floor of the booth crying. 

“Matthew! god where did that kid go… Birdie! Seriously, where the fuck are you?!” He heard the Albino guy he’d been trained by calling for him some time later, but he had ignored it. 

A few minutes later the door opened and the barely adult stood in front of him “Shit birdie…” he muttered as Matthew looked up sobbing. The coat laid open, only a ripped skirt covering him, blossoming bruises and bite marks on full display. Gilbert had sighed giving him a sad look and moved to scoop him up with a grunt, cradling him against a hard pale chest. “Let’s get you back inside ja?” he muttered as they moved back towards the house. 

\----

“You okay birdie?” the knock at the bathroom door pulled him out of it. 

He turned and opened the door with a smile, pushing everything back as he looked into the familiar red eyes, “Yeah, I’m fine.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of forgot about this fic. oops! but I do still love it! here's a new chapter!

Once again the sky was stained orange, marking another morning and another shift ended. The wind was light and only mildly cool against the blondes exposed skin and he walked the three blocks to where he had to park his car. Tomorrow, or rather, tonight was his night off. Time he would spend sleeping and relaxing hopefully. There would be no Gil there tonight. The albino man was staying at his own apartment with his brother, It made the commute easier. 

Matthew rolled his neck groaning at the stiffness. It’s not that he minded being tied up, but damn it could leave an awful kink… on top of that, he was coming down and he didn’t have anymore pills with him at the moment. This alone was enough to put him in a bad mood, coming down from his high always made him cranky. Hopefully his moronic brother would have the good sense to be asleep when he got home. 

He climbed into his car with a small sigh and a smile. At least when he got in he could pop a few of those amazing little white babies and just let himself drift off happily. though he needed to make a note to call his dealer in the morning and order more. He could get through a day off without if he needed to, but work without Vicodin? that would be hell. 

Nothing was out of the ordinary as Matthew pulled his car into his parking spot, pushing the automatic locks and smiling at the ba-beep that echoed in result. So close.. so close to his lovely lovely pills. He practically ran up the stairs, tripping only once as he went. When he entered the apartment his brother wasn’t anywhere to be seen. That was… concerning. 

He dismissed the dark thoughts of why the living room and kitchen were empty dropping his keys on the table by the door. Instead he focused on getting to his bedroom and that little stash of his. When he reached his dresser and opened the drawer he sighed. little was right. How had he managed to go through so many so quickly again?! 

He shook the bottle, there were enough to get Matthew through the next twenty-four hours, thirty if he really pushed it. He would take two now, and call when he woke in the evening to restock. The pills slid down easily aided by the stale glass of water that sat on his night stand and he laid back on his bed, waiting to slip out of himself and into sleep. 

-

Matthew woke a short while later feeling fuzzy. There was a heaviness on him, he wrapped his arms up and around the body, humming happily. Hmm Gil was so nice and warm, so perfect for snuggling and holding. He smelled amazing to, just like.. Matthew paused that didn’t smell like Gil. His eyes cracked open and he retracted his arms shooting a glare 

“What the fuck are you doing Alfred? Get off”

Above him his brother was merely smirked sitting up now that he was released from the prison of arms. “I only came in to check on you Mattie… and then I saw you laying there, all curled up and sweet looking.” Matthew glared at the hand that brushed blonde curls from his eyes. He went to swat the hand away, but predictably it was caught and pinned to the bed. Matthew set a look of displeasure on his face knowing he couldn’t win a fight like this with is brother. “You always did look absolutely delicious when you pouted” but that wouldn’t stop his mouth

“And you always did look fat from this angle.” he snarked

Alfred smirked “What a mouth you have on you…. “ He lowered himself, trailing kisses along Matthew’s throat, "Maybe I was too hasty... " Alfred purred affixing his mouth to Matthew's shoulder, tongue tracing the marks of his last client. “Maybe I should have kept you like this… Under me, sweet little words and blushes” he licked up Matthew's neck causing the smaller blonde to shudder unpleasantly. “You calling me Alfie, batting those pretty purple eyes of yours...” his hips settled on Matthews groin and rolled down “While I fucked you”

Okay. There was a line, and It had been crossed “Alfred, get the fuck off of me.”

“Awe come on Mattie? What’s a little fun? For old time’s sake” Alfred’s lips smashed against his, Matthew gasping in surprise and protesting against the tongue that darted into his mouth. He bit down on his brothers lip hard and Alfred pulled away with a yelp. “The fuck dude?!” he half yelled.

Matthew glared up at him, ignoring the metallic taste in his mouth, Alfred’s eyes were glassy, pupils dilated. of course he was high! Matthews eyes darted to the dresser and back to his brother "What the fuck are you even on?"

“damnit bro, now I’m bleeding.” He was dabbing blood gingerly off his face. Good, Matthew thought bitterly.

“God damnit, answer me Alfred” Matthew snarled

“I don’t fuckin' know, whatever shit you left on the kitchen counter. “

“I don’t leave my shit on the counter! You came into my fucking room and broke into my stash!” 

Alfred rolled his eyes getting up “Dude… way to kill my boner. “ 

Finally released, a pissed off Matthew stood and walked to his dresser. He grabbed out what was left of the pills and his messenger bag, he was still in his clothing from this morning, so no worries about needing to change. “I am so sick of your shit Al, You need to get the fuck out of here. You have until I’m off work tomorrow or I’m gonna fuckin' let Gilbert forcefully remove your ass!” he walked to the front door. “I’ll be back in a couple hours, you best be packing your crap.” the door slammed behind him. God damned moron! 

\--

Matthew was back three hours later, it was closing in on five in the evening. He had gone and pounded on his dealers door until it was opened. Finally, after begging and apologizing and basically crying, the guy had caved, forgiving him for the door and hooking him up with a full bottle. It was a relief to know he had them. It was also a relief to have found the lock box he decided he needed to put them in. After he had done all that, he still felt no urge to go back home. 

 

He sighed as he stood in front of the door. He had had some time to cool off, but this still was not something he wanted to have to deal with. Matthew just wanted to get inside, take his vicodin and forget for a while. He knew, however, with Alfred It was never that easy. It would be the ‘I’m sorry Mattie’ and ‘come on bro! give me another chance’ . Matthew wasn’t even sure if he wanted to fight it, or just skip it and give in. 

He opened the door “Look Al, I don’t even wanna start on any of this arguing shit until-” he paused… “You have to be fucking kidding me” Sitting there on the couch, on his couch, was a kid. Couldn’t be a day over thirteen and that was fucking pushing it. “Alfred F Jones where the FUCK are you?!” No answer fantastic…


	6. Chapter 6

Matthew turned to the now scared looking kid. He sighed and shut the door walking towards the couch slowly. “Hey kid, you okay?” he asked carefully… god he really didn’t like kids. Anything under the age of seventeen was irritating, under fourteen, unbearable. 

“I…I came on my own… He didn’t force me here or anything...” The blonde boy said with an attitude that made Matthew close his eyes in frustration.

“Alright… lets try another. Where is my brother?” A door in the hall opened only a second later. 

“Okay Peter I think we’re gonna have'ta- oh shit…” Alfred had frozen in the entrance to the living room, his keys in his hands.

Matthew stood and set his violet eyes blazing on his brother “You have five minutes to gather your shit and get the fuck out. I suggest you skip fucking town you unbelievable ass!”

“Mattie, chill okay? We were just leaving. Right Peter?” He smiled at the kid and Matthews eyes flashed down, under that snotty little face was fear at the suggestion 

“Not a fucking chance.” his eyes skirted back to his brother coldly “You’re leaving. Alone. I’m taking your latest _victim_ to the cop shop.” 

“Peters not forced to be here Mattie. He wants to be!”

“uh-huh... “ Matthew turned towards the kid “Hey, Peter?” he was trying his best to be sweet. just act like he’s a client your not planning on fucking… “Did you want to get dragged around the country and dumped off at a whore house in about four years? Or do you want me to take you somewhere safe so you can go home?” 

“What the actual fuck Matthew!?” 

“What Al?! Don’t like them to know the truth?” he bit back, looking at his brother. 

“I wanna go with Matthew” came the very quiet voice from the couch. Matthew turned with a relieved smile. 

Alfred on the other hand, scowled. “Fine, be a fucking pussy then. I’m fucking out of here. Good luck with the cops, ya know with your totally legal job and your totally non-existent drug habit asshole” he grabbed his coat and bag, taking off towards the door, ripping it open and slamming it shut. 

Matthew only looked away when he heard the kid crying. Oh god… “Okay, hey… It’s okay kid alright? But we’re gonna need a story alright?” He urged. Peter nodded. Okay… at least that part was easy. “You’re going to say that Alfred had left you in the car and you ran off to find help and you found me. If not they’re gonna think I took you and it’s gonna cause a lot of shit alright?”

“Okay… can we go now?”

-

Matthew drove them to the police station, he was starting to shake. vicodin coming out of his system… He just wanted to get this over with and go home. The pair exited the vehicle and walked through the parking lot until, suddenly, peter stopped walking. Matthew turned “Hey come on kid. Almost there. Whats wrong?” 

“They’re gonna be mad at me… They told me not to talk to people online I didn’t know…” The kid was shaking, tears in his eyes 

Matthew sighed and crouched in front of him, “Look peter. I promise, Your parents are gonna just be so happy you’re safe okay? They may be a bit disappointed, but I think we all know you're not gonna go making the same mistake again right?” Peter nodded “Okay then” Matthew stood and took the kids hand “I’ll be right there with you alright?” 

They finally made it up the steps and into the police station. Matthew was nearly deafened by a screech coming from a near by office. Two men came barreling out and towards them. Matthews eyes went wide with confusion and shock until it clicked that peter was pulling out of his grasp and running towards them. 

“Peter! You're okay! Where have you been we’ve been looking for days!” Matthew stood awkwardly just inside the police station doors watching as the family all clustered together in an embrace. Jealousy tugged in the back of his mind, but he quickly dismissed it. There was no point dwelling on the past

“Excuse me” Matthews head turned away from the reunion. “You came in with Peter correct?” 

“Uh.. yes I-”

“He saved me! There was a bad man, Alfred, who wanted to take me all across the country and Matthew told him he couldn’t have me and he was bringing me back to my family, and Alfred got mad and stormed off. Then Matthew drove me all the way down here! Isn’t he great!” peter broke away from his family and attached to the suddenly dread filled Matthew… 

Dammit kid… he thought to himself, we went over the story six times in the car. No wonder Al got to you. He gave an uneasy chuckle, patting the boy on the back “It wasn’t all that exciting really… I uh… I just recognized the guy he was with from some poster I’d seen somewhere… Peter looked uncomfortable, so I asked him if he was okay, he said no and I stepped in, that’s all. Right Pete?”

Peter pouted for a moment, eyebrows furrowing then his eyes opened wide and he nodded. “Exactly!” 

“I don’t care how it happened!” Exclaimed the smaller of the blonde fathers before he embraced Matthew as well. “You brought my baby back to me!” 

Matthew was exceedingly uncomfortable with this. He stood stiffly and looked towards the officer for help. 

The officer he stared at cleared his throat. “Sir… I uh I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you a few questions for our report” 

“Yes of course, I’m sorry Peter, err… Peter's family… If you’ll just... “ he wiggled his way out of the hugs “Excuse me.” He followed the officer after another round of thank-yous. He was relieved to get out of the mushy moment, but nervous because he was off to be asked question while he was coming down off a drug he had no prescription for… no to mention the name ‘Matthew Williams” was not going to be in their database… His birth name was Matthew Kirkland and he sure as hell wasn’t giving them that.. He’d rather deal with whatever came with using a fake name then dredging up a close to decade old kidnapping case. There would never be a happy reunion in his case. 

Matthew was lead to a questioning room and sat at the desk “Would you like some water? A coffee?” The officer asked. 

Matthew smiled and gave a small nod “Water would be nice thanks” He leaned his head back and sighed after the officer left to grab him a glass. If he ever saw Alfred again, Matthew was going to kill him. He sighed, no he wasn't’. Matthew stood from his seat and paced. No, Alfred being out there was as much Matthew’s fault as anyone else… If he hadn’t been such a dumb love struck kid, he would have had the brains to turn Alfred in. Run for the first adult he could and get taken safely back home. Alfred would have gone to jail, and he wouldn’t be doing this shit.

Then again… At the time Matthew had thought they’d always be together. He assumed his brothers love for him was because Matthew was Matthew… not because Matthew was a child. He had been naive and look where it got him. He was a whore, coming down too quickly off his Vicodin in the middle of a cop shop because he just had to get a kid away from his pedo brother. Oh yeah… great life choices... 

He had been in there for a while. Where the hell was that cop with the water.. or a detective to ask questions? 

Matthew reached into the pockets of the too small jean shorts he still wore and pulled out his phone. He cringed. 6:30. At least he wasn’t working tonight. He hesitated for a moment.. God know how long he’d be here… He clicked Gils name and quickly typed out a text

“@ the cop shop. Found a lost kid, being questioned. let u know when Im out.”

He pressed send just as the door opened. “Hello Matthew” finally. “My name’s detective Bonnefoy” blood drained from Matthew's face as he looked towards the familiar voice. Francis Bonnefoy stood in the room, a small smile on his face. Francis had been one of his father's closest and most treasured enemies. When Matthew was a child the two had fought, drank, chatted and ( although they had no clue anyone knew) fucked frequently. 

Matthew shook off his momentary panic. The man hadn’t seen him since he was twelve! Matthew had grown and changed, no way he’d remember him. Matthew relaxed and shot him a charming smile “Hello, detective.” he held out his hand to shake “I would say it’s nice to meet you, but with circumstances being what they are” he gave a shrug. 

Francis ignored the hand held out, eyes glue on the file in front of him as he hummed in acknowledgment. Matthew dropped it awkwardly. Unsure of what to do he moved to sit. “Am I in some sort of trouble here?” He raised an eyebrow 

“Some sort, yes” Said Francis finally looking away from the file and moving to the table, he tossed the file in front of Matthew before sitting down and tenting his fingers in front of his face with a hard look. 

Matthew looked down at the file in front of him. Shit. 

‘Matthew James Kirkland.  
d.o.b July 1st 1994.  
last seen: June 5th 2006.’

He looked at the two pictures in the file. One was one of him taken a few weeks before he ran off, the second was an age progressed piece labeled ‘2013. 19 years’. Well.. the age progression software was impressive. That looked almost exactly like him. 

Matthews eyes looked up coldly as he thought of several ways to kill his brother. 

\-----

“Where the hell have you been?” Matthew slumped in his chair and looked away in irritation. How the hell did they even track him?! He was no where near new york… California, other side of the damn country and Francis Bonnefoy happened to show up! what are the chances. 

“What are you doing all the way out here anyway?” He grumbled 

“We’ve been trying to catch your brother. He left a sixteen year old missing girl over a few states and she had a picture. He was seen in California a few days after Peter went missing.” He said, clearly irritated with the topic. “I don’t suppose you know where we went”

“ Girls now huh? That’s unexpected… and here I thought he only swung the one way” he muttered ignoring the question. 

“Matthew, If you know where he went and you don’t tell me you’ll be charged with aiding and abetting.” Francis warned 

Matthew tilted his head back staring at the ceiling. He was aching everywhere and his nose was starting to run. damn stupid pills. “He was in my apartment with the kid. I told him to get the fuck out and that he wasn’t taking Peter with him. I don’t know where the hell he went, far away I imagine. Running is kind of his thing.” 

There was scratching on a notepad and Matthews irritation at the situation rose. His icy gaze settled back on the Frenchman in front of him “Am I being charged with anything? or can I go? I mean congrats, you found me. All done, case closed. Leave me the fuck alone now right?” 

Francis sighed “I could charge you with several things. Fraud for anything you’ve use a fake name with, obstructing an investigation, I could even arrest you under suspicion of kidnapping. We could search your car, your residence, do drug testing, judging by how much you're sweating currently I doubt that would come back clean…or...” he trailed off.

“ Or?” Matthew said with a hard glare, he didn’t like where this was going. 

Francis leaned forward, resting his chin in one of his hands. “You could wait here willingly for your father to get here. His plane should arrive by the morning. He’s taking the red eye.” 

Matthews face drained for the second time since Francis had entered the room. This time it was joined by a turning stomach and shaking. His father…


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments for me are like people clapping for Tinkerbell. They bring fics back to life and push me to write. Thank you to the people who commented, here's the next chapter! I hope you enjoy!

Francis had the decency not to make him wait in the uncomfortable interview room, Instead he spoke to his superiors explaining he was going to take Matthew back to Francis’s hotel suit so their father son reunion could be a bit more comfortable. 

Realistically It was probably because he didn’t need Matthew withdrawing in the middle of a police station thus ruining the power he currently had over Matthew to make this possible.

After a round of questioning on what had transpired after his ‘kidnapping’ (Matthew insisting the whole time he had run away more than been kidnapped. He had left and stayed away willingly.) He had been escorted out to Francis’s sleek black car. 

He had cast a longing look at his own silver sports car, wishing desperately for the bag that still contained his stash.. but he sure as hell wasn’t going after that with three cops watching him.

They arrived at the upscale hotel just the two of them. They made their way into the elevator and up to the third floor. The room was nice enough. A small kitchen, bathroom, sitting room and a separate bedroom off to the side. It was almost the size of Matthew’s apartment. Must be nice to be able to stay in this kind of place while chasing down pervs… he thought idly as he walked in and readied himself for a long, grueling wait. 

\---  
.  
Matthew was currently situated on Francis's couch, sweating, shaking a bit and groaning in pain. It was four am and close to twenty hours since his last dose. For someone who would be popping then every four or five hours, that was a hell of a long time without. 

It would get worse, of course, if he didn’t get home and to his stash. If he could just take two more, he’d at least be able to deal with this. He had hoped Francis would fall asleep and he could just creep into the night, let Gil know, and disappear for a while. 

Obviously Francis had thought of this. 

The blonde man sat in one of the chairs in the sitting area, leaned back comfortable with his glasses perched on his nose. He was reading some french book. Matthew couldn’t really see what it said from so far away, his vision wasn’t the best, but glasses didn’t work well in his line of work. Besides, even if he could, he didn’t know any french. well unless you count “Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir” 

In all honesty, Matthew wasn’t much of a reader anyway. Running off shortly after grade seven and not ever going back to school hindered that ability. Just slightly. 

This was one of the many reasons he did not want to see his father, why he simply didn’t run back home after Alfred dumped him. Going back to Daddy when you're a pedo-reject who's done god knows what with no marketable skills because you never made it to high school? Oh yeah.. Arthur would be so proud of that. he could see the bumper sticker now ‘my run-away son could beat up your honour student’. So charming. Maybe that would make a good Christmas present. 

Why was he even coming anyway? Francis obviously knew he was a druggy, From the way he was dressed it wasn’t hard to guess what he did for a living, all this paired with his obviously sunny disposition at the thought of it all… Had he not told him? 

Worse, had he told him and Arthur simply wanted to come and tell him he was disowned in person? His father, from what he remembered, would be the type. He could still remember Arthur drunkenly telling Francis the tale of kicking Alfred’s ass out of the house after discovering his less than innocent feeling towards Matthew. They had been in the dining room with no clue Matthew had snuck out of bed and was eavesdropping 

It was probably a good thing Arthur hadn’t had anymore kids honestly.

Francis looked up from his book, blue eyes that were annoyingly like Alfred's took in the clock on the wall. “His plane is landing in a half hour, He’s taking a taxi straight here…” The look was shifted to Matthew and his voice was kind “Would you like me to lend you something else to wear cher? Maybe something with a little more cover oui?” 

Matthew debated snapping at him telling him no, it wasn’t going to make a difference and he didn’t give a shit if he saw his father stark fucking naked… But instead he sighed “Yeah, okay” Francis rose from his seat, waiting for Matthew to do the same. 

The small blonde whore followed the other man into the bedroom that was off to the side of the main suit area.That was something he was use to. His dark humour rang as he considered the fact that he was covering up in this situation instead of undressing.

Francis gestured to a chair in the corner of the room and Matthew sat. He watched as the Frenchman looked through his clothing picking out a simple white t-shirt and a pair of jeans. 

Good… Matthew was so not in the mood to wear any of that corporate button up bullshit. Besides, It wouldn’t fool anyone. Trash in a tie is still trash. 

-

Matthew sat on the couch in the clothing he had dragged on. It felt uncomfortable to be covered, but at the same time he wished for his hoody to hide in. He so didn’t want to do this. He couldn’t tell if it was nerves or the drugs making his stomach turn, but when the hotel phone went off and he heard Francis okaying Arthur to be sent up, Matthew made a mad dash for the toilet. 

He slammed the door and hovered over the bowl as he retched. “Are you okay Matthew?” Came Francis’s voice at the door. 

“Do I fucking sound oka-” more retching. God damnit!

There was a sigh from outside the bathroom door, and then, only a few minutes later, a very loud banging knock from the main room. 

Matthews stomach stopped contracting, but he gripped the porcelain tightly. He hung his head trying to get his breathing under control. Anxiety from withdrawal and this particular happening mingling and pushing him to the brink of a mental break down. He should have asked Francis to let him have some pills… the damn cop already knew so it was a safe bet he wouldn’t have cared. 

“Where is he?!” came a panicked decidedly british voice. It rocked through Matthew, his breath catching. 

Arthur sounded rough, exhausted and like he had smoked half a pack of smokes in one sitting. However it was still his father's voice… He hadn’t heard it in years. The last time being when he caught the tail end of a TV interview begging for him to be returned safely. Guilt twinged and he pushed it back.

Matthew couldn’t quite make out Francis’s quieter, calm reply, but it was no mystery as to what he said when the hard voice drew closer to his hiding spot shouting “I don’t bloody care if he’s puking! I want to see him now!”

For a second Matthew thought of locking the door, hiding in the bathroom like the coward he was, refusing once again to face this problem. He’d been avoiding it for nine years, why not another three hours locked in a bathroom?

But he wasn’t fast enough. he’d managed to crawl halfway to the bathroom door when it crashed open. Violet eyes reluctantly went up to meet fiery, tear filled green ones. there was a moment of staring between them, Francis standing behind Arthur with his arms crossed and a sad look on his stupid face.

Matthew swallowed dryly and he croaked “Hey Dad” He then proceeded to puke once more. Directly on Arthur's shoes...


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much for taking longer to update this... re reading it sparked the story line to continue in my brain.

Matthew stood outside on the balcony. He was leaned against the railing taking a long drag off his cigarette. Across from him in a similar position was Arthur. The man’s calculating eyes not leaving Matthew for a second. It was like he thought if he looked away Matthew would disappear again. It was less then comfortable. 

Matthew cast his own glances, though they were brief. As he did he took in details. Arthur looked to be just slightly taller than him. (Matthew guessed he probably would have grown more if years twelve through sixteen weren’t spent eating almost nothing but crap gas station food and fast food.) There was grey streaked through the sandy hair, wrinkles forming by his eyes. He was still clean shaven, but the dark circles and pallid complexion pointed to the fact that he wasn’t exactly in good health. Arthur's own hands shook as he took drags, Matthew figure that was probably due to the situation more than anything. Still it gave Matthew a scapegoat for his own trembling as he felt it worsening.

This particular activity had been suggested by Francis shortly after Arthur had lost his shoes and socks to Matthew’s uneasy stomach. It had been a godsend really.. Along with his pills his smokes had been left in his bag in the car. He had jumped eagerly on the offer of one of the cancer-sticks when Francis held them out, ignoring the look Arthur gave. Maybe it would stop his hands from shaking for five seconds. 

Matthew exhaled and shifted his gaze out to over the city. The silence hung so uncomfortably, but what was he suppose to say? Sorry I took off and put you through hell, but hey at least you got a few good years of assuming I was dead. They could discuss work, Hey dad, still working at that publishing firm? Me? Oh yeah, I sell myself to people who fuck me for hours on end… The pole dancing I do once a week really helped keep me in shape too! To bad the pills kind of counteract the health benefits… but I really didn’t plan on living past forty anyway. 

Oh wait! They could talk about Alfred! Good old Alfie. Maybe it could lessen the blow of what a disappointment Matthew was. Did ya hear he tried to kidnap yet another kid? I think this woulda been his fourth? Maybe fifth... I kinda rescued the kid though, obviously a mistake since it landed us here in this hotel room awkwardly staring at each other… I’m sure Alfred will have another by next month anyway… 

Yup, so many conversations… 

It was Arthur who finally broke the silence. “Why?” 

Well... if that wasn’t an open ended question, “Why what exactly?”

“Why did you leave Matthew? Why didn’t you call or come back home?” He sounded like he was barely holding his temper. Was there an answer to that that wouldn’t cause the sandy haired brit to scream? Probably not. 

Matthew shrugged, eyes still focused on the city instead of the problem in front of him, He spoke apathetically, shielding himself from whatever reaction he got, “I left because I was in love with my brother. Stupid, puppy love towards someone I admired who seemed to care about nothing but me.” 

He ashed the smoke over the rail, watching as it fell into the shadows. He took another drag and spoke upon exhaling “ I stayed away because I wasn’t the little boy you lost anymore. Al ditched me I was 16, and by the time i had given up on him coming back for me, I was already in a less than desirable job for six months. But hey, worlds oldest profession and all that.” He gave a bitter laugh and turned to Glance at Arthur. 

The man looked sick. Matthews heart sank, He turned away again, this time leaning over the railing and looking down as he continued, nerves he tried to push back were leaking into his words,“I wasn’t a kid anymore. There wasn't a whole lot of hope for me being normal. Being rejected again didn't really appeal to me ya know? Abandonment issues and all that.” He chuckled darkly “‘Sides, not like the pay was bad” 

“You honestly think…” The words were filled with quiet anger and hurt that turned Matthews stomach. “I would have turned you away?” Matthew shrugged looking down at his hands. 

"Well, I watched what happened with Alfred. You kicked out one type of perv, why would I have been any different" He sighed "You already had a disappointment for a son splashed across the news, at least if people assumed I was dead you didn't have to deal with a second one right?"

“How dare you...”

And here it came… Exactly what he’d been talking about. The final rejection. The nail in the coffin of ‘You’re worthless and no one wants you’. Matthew eased his eyes closed and waited. He heard foot steps and waited for impact. The only thing he could think of at that moment was, please not my face, I have to work and Lars’ll be pissed if I have a bruise. 

Arthur’s rough hand closed on his thin arm and yanked Matthew to face him. His eyes flew open at the movement as he stumbled to right himself, Cigarette falling from his hand and down to the ground. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Francis, who had been pretending to read, rise from his seat in alarm. 

"I was such a terrible father that you thought It was more important to me what the hell they thought? As if I would be more concerned over my own damn image then the fact that my bloody son was alive!" Matthew flinched away from Arthur's words, but was suddenly surrounded by arms that held tight. A head dropped to Matthew’s shoulder as he stood awkwardly in the embrace. Arthur was obviously sobbing as he held the smaller blonde in the vise-like grip.

Matthew had dealt with clients crying… he had learned to cry on cue for the ones who liked that shit… but he wasn’t sure how to deal with honestly comforting someone. 

And he wasn’t exactly comfortable with the idea of slipping into work mode with his father. Who know’s why it would make him so uncomfortable considering his relationship history with family… but apparently the incest train had started and ended with his big brother.

Thank god.

Awkwardly Matthew put his shaky hands on Arthur’s back, patting as he threw an ‘Oh god help me’ look towards Francis. 

The french bastard simply sat back down and looked pointedly at his book once more. Well fuck you too Francis… 

Even as a child, Matthew could never remember Arthur being the overly affectionate type of parent. Up until about eight he had sat Matthew snuggled next to him to read stories, but even that small amount pretty much tapered off from there. Really most of his hugs and affection growing up had come from Alfred. 

Huh… Well… That explains a lot. 

Thank the withdrawal heavens for excuses, Matthews stomach suddenly rolled unpleasantly. He shoved Arthur away “Excuse me I gotta-” He bolted making it to the toilet just in time to cough up the only thing left in his stomach, bile. 

As he continued to cough unpleasantly he felt fingers in his hair, holding it back and out of his face. He didn’t want them there… He’d rather have to wash it out of his hair. The only person he even trusted enough to let them near him normally if he was in withdrawal was Gilbert. 

Fuck… Gil. 

His stomach shuddered and settled a few minutes later, apparently realizing there was no more reason to contract, it had emptied everything. His throat burned but he managed to croak a request “I need my cell phone…” 

“Why?” Came Arthur’s snapped suspicious tone. 

Matthew held back his natural response of snark and took a shuddering breath, his head was starting to spin. “I need to Call Gil”

Arthur’s hands reluctantly pulled away as Matthew sat back, he leaned against the shower stall. He was hurting everywhere, his body use to numbness. If he couldn’t have his damn pills right now he at least wanted to hear the Albino, if not see him… “Who’s Gil?” 

Matthew contemplated how to answer that. 'A fellow whore I like to snuggle with' probably wasn’t a good choice. A co-worker was obviously out then… besides too impersonal. A friend? still not right, that sounds like a dealer or something… He sighed at the use of the word, “My boyfriend, I guess. Just… My phone please so I can tell him I’m okay”

Francis was already there with it. Maybe he was trying to spare Arthur the sight of Matthews not really there outfit from earlier.

Or maybe now Matthew had done as he said he would, he was simply trying to get him to stay longer by being accommodating. 

Either way It didn’t matter, as long as he got to hear the rough german voice… He unlocked his phone, cringing at the amount of texts and missed calls, and quickly pressed the contact. His eyes looked at both men standing in the bathroom expectantly, but it was apparent they were going no where. 

“Birdie?! what the hell happened?! I’m going to come bail you out right now, I just need another ten minutes and I’ll be there okay? Don’t panic.”

“Gil! Stop okay, I’m fine. I’m… I’m not at the cop shop anymore." He paused and his brows knit together, "Wait… did you walk all the way there?”

“Well duh.” he said and Matthew could hear the eye roll. Matthew was kind of touched... that was a hell of a long walk! “What the hell is going on Birdie?”

Matthew bit his lip considering. “Look, do you still have my spare car key?”

“..yeah”

“Good, My cars in the police station parking lot.. go pick it up and come meet me at uhm… hold on.” He looked at the two glaring faces and rolled his eyes, Matthew rose to stand walking past them and towards the hotel phone, he found the usual complimentary note pad and read off the address and hotel name. 

“But why are you there?”

“It’s a long story… Just come get me? I need… uh.. I need some sleep and stuff before work… I’ll be useless if I don’t get it. I don’t exactly have a lay down and take it client tonight…” There was the sound of a snarl and murmured arguments behind him, but he choose to ignore them. He was way to busy trying to keep himself from sobbing over the phone to worry about what else his words were doing... 

“I’ll be there soon Birdie okay? promise.”

“Thank you Gil…I love you” The other end of the phone when quiet for a second then Matthew could hear his sneakers hitting the pavement faster

“I’ll be there _really_ soon” The phone beeped and Matthews hand went to his mouth to muffle a whimper as he pushed back tears that stung his eyes. The only time Matthew every uttered those words to the Albino was when he was really and truly in need of comfort. It was only in those moments after all, that he let himself consider that they were true. 

Matthew placed a hand on the table, balancing himself as he tried to regain composure.

“You’re not going back to work at that place.” Came the curt voice behind him. It was irritating, but at least it chased away the desire to break down. “The only place you're going is to the airport and then home with me.” Don’t yell… Just keep your cool. 

Matthew looked back at him briefly “I’m 21 Arthur, I can go where I want” With that he headed back to Francis’s room, not hesitating for a moment to strip out of the borrowed clothing and back into his own. If they wanted to watch, they were welcome. It's not like hundreds of other people hadn't seen him in that state on show night.

The men had followed him, Arthur fuming. “Can’t you arrest him or something?!” He yelled at Francis. Green eyes widened as he looked over the shorts Matthew apparently had painted on. If he hadn't been mid-fleeing he may have found the reaction funny.

“Our deal was “ He said with a final bounce to get the material to sit comfortably before he buttoned and zipped them “I stick around and see him, and i was off the hook right? Well I saw him, now I have a life to get back too.” He moved from the room, shoving his cell phone in his pocket as he went.

“We could arrest you if you go back to work…” came Francis’s tired voice. Maybe if he hadn’t been forced here and then left to deal with the awkwardness he would be inclined to feel bad for how long Francis had been awake… but he didn’t. Besides, the comment irked him. 

“So, you’re big plan is to arrest me to keep me around?” he couldn’t even believe the nerve of it… he let out a chuckle and snipped "Oh, that's definitely convinced me to go with you then!" He had done what they asked. Arthur had his answers, he could continue on with life and yet he insisted on this. He wanted more. What did he think? Matthew was gonna magically be unfucked up and twelve again? 

Matthew was doing a final check to make sure he had everything when Arthur grabbed his arm, stopping his stride from reaching the door and yanking him back. There was a desperate look to him. “I’d rather you be behind bars then disappearing again.” he growled. 

Matthew tried to yank his arm away, the touch hurt. Frankly though, his muscles weren't exactly on his side right now so it didn't really do much besides cause the older man to tighten his grip… Matthew cringed and snapped “Why? Why do you want me back _now_? What exactly do you expect to happen Arthur?” He snapped. 

“I am still your father!” he yelled back, Matthew could see tears he was fighting back. 

Matthew wasn’t a total ass. Really, he could feel the guilt and whatever other painful emotions were brewing in the back of his mind. He just was really good at pushing those away and ignoring them. He’d been doing it for years. He had to do it to survive. Turning that switch off and suddenly falling into Daddies arms crying over how he was sorry and he missed him and of course he would come home and never leave again, was just not gonna happen. 

Non-the-less he tried his best... “Look… err… Dad…” He cringed. There were way too many clients who liked to be called Daddy for that to really be comfortable… “What if-” He sighed knowing he was going to regret this “What if I let you come and stay at my place… just… “ His other hand went to his face. both because he was so done with this… and because he wanted to hide how severely he was so done with this. “ I only really have a couch to offer… but your welcome to it” He forced out. This felt like a bad Idea on so many levels, but It was the only way he could possibly see getting out of the damn hotel room without the promise of handcuffs.

Arthur's face looked to be calculating, weighing his options. He probably assumed his whore son lived in a run down little apartment on the wrong side of the tracks and was worrying about being stabbed or catching something from the couch… He was sure seeing the sports car would just convince Arthur that he sells drugs on the side to. Sorry pops, I only buy he thought to himself. Matthew would be a shitty dealer. Too high to work, and taking all his merchandise himself.

“Fine” Came the curt answer finally. Fingers let go of Matthew’s arm and he almost whimpered as he felt the blood flowing back to the spot. 

His phone picked that moment to vibrate in his pocket. He reached inside and pulled it out pressing answer. “Hey Gil…”

“Birdie, I’m here. Where are you?”

“We’ll be down in a minute.”

“We? Is that jackass brother of yours with you? What the fuck did he do now?!” Matthew worried momentarily for his steering wheel under Gilberts clearly pissed off grip

“Not Alfred. Uhm…” Matthew sighed, crossing an arm over his chest and glancing back at Arthur. His voice attempted humour, coming off more nervous then anything, “Is it too soon to introduce you to my father?”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had such back writers block... just... ugh. probably because all my stories are getting to angsty or dark points at once XD. It's sad when i look at this one as my light piece ^.^''
> 
> Either way! I've managed to get this out! I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Arthur borrowed a pair of socks from Francis. His shoes, though still wet, had been cleaned off as best they could. He barely even flinched as he pulled them on quickly, apparently he didn’t want Matthew to have a chance to escape again. 

It was a tempting thought… dashing away, jumping in the car and telling Gilbert to just drive somewhere fast and far. However, being on the run again and having to resettle just seemed like an exhausting process. Especially if his accounts were frozen or whatever...

Matthew slid on his own sandals, and stretched his sore muscles as he waited. His shirt rode up a bit showing off the glittering gem in his belly button. He caught the way Arthur froze when he saw it and Matthew quickly dropped his arms pulling the shirt back down. 

He couldn’t help the tiny voice in the back of his head that wanted his father's approval. He tried to beat it back, that was never going to happen so there was no point! He turned his back and crossed his arm as he waited. 

Seconds later he heard Arthur rise and took off towards the door without a backwards glance

“Good luck Arthur”

“Thank you Francis…” he murmured as he moved to keep up with the blonde. 

When the elevator finally dinged and opened in the lobby Matthew let out the breath he had been holding. Slowest. Elevator. Ever. 

He crossed his arms and took all of five steps before her heard the rough german accent calling out his name. Matthew turned and smiled slightly as Gil bounded across the lobby and wrapped arms around him., one hand cupping the back of Matthew's hair as a kiss was placed on his temple.

Matthews hands instantly hooked around his back, clinging to his t shirt and burying his face in the Albinos shoulder. “You okay birdie?” he muttered squeezing a little tighter Matthew shook his head letting himself go just a little in arms that made him feel safe finally. 

Behind them there was a not so subtle cough. Right. That problem. 

Matthew reluctantly pulled away, going on his tip toes to steal the quick kiss he needed for this. 

“Arthur, Gilbert. Gilbert, My.. uh… My father, Arthur…” Matthew said wearily, Gilbert's hands resting on his shoulders grounding him, though he still shook.

The two stared at one and other. Arthur’s eyes zeroing in on the tattoos that showed from the edges of the shirt with distaste. Gilbert’s eyes narrowing as he sized up the put off looking brit. 

It was a really uncomfortable moment. 

Really uncomfortable. 

“Nice to meet you…” Said Gil, still not appreciating the way Arthur was eyeing the snake tattoo that curled from Gilbert’s bicep and down his forearm. 

“pleasure I’m sure…” Responded Arthur tensely. 

Matthew really really just wanted to get to the car… besides the awkwardness that’s where his pills were, and if this wasn’t a reason to get high? well what the hell was?

Matthew looked up at his more-than-friend with a sheepish smile, “Gil, can you drive us back, I have a headache.” He asked knowing the Albino had long since figured out Matthews state. Not exactly a good one to be driving in.

“Course birdie,” turning his eyes from Arthur Gilbert turned and placed a kiss on Matthew’s forehead “do you have your meds with you?” 

“Yeah in my bag, I forgot it in the car.” 

Gilbert nodded and the three of them started walking, Matthew tucked under Gil’s arm, clinging to the security he provided, while Arthur trailed behind. Matthew could feel the eyes burning into the back of his skull. He ignored the voice that told him to back off of Gil because Daddy was watching, and instead wrapped his slim arms around the Albinos waist as they walked. 

If Arthur wanted to have anything to do with him, and Matthew couldn’t figure out why he would at this point, Arthur was going to have to deal with this. It was more likely, in Matthew’s mind, that Arthur would simply leave and forget him after today. What would the point of scrambling for the man’s approval now be?

They got to the car and Matthew didn’t miss the confused look, he opened the door and leaned the seat forward to let Arthur climb in the back. He wasn’t about to stick those two in the front together.

Once he was in and the seat was folded back, Matthew sat, strapping himself in and grabbing his bag. Discreetly as possible, he shook two pills out of the unlabeled prescription bottle. Before Gilbert even back out of the parking spot he had grabbed the now warm bottle of water, downing them easily. 

Just twenty minutes… twenty and he could handle this. 

He pulled out the pack of smokes next, rolling down the window and holding it out open to Arthur in the back. “Want one?” he asked, trying his best to sound friendly and unawkward. 

Nothing weird about your kid offering you a cigarette at all. 

Arthur took one reluctantly with a murmured thanks, and Matthew took another out of the pack for himself. As he lit it, Matthew heard another lighter click and then a muttered “Rotten time to quit i suppose...” He held back a chuckle, that’s an understatement. 

He held the pack out once more to Gilbert with a raised eyebrow. The Albino would switch on and off from smoking. He had managed to stay miraculously clean for their line of work. His only vise being Alcohol and bouts of ‘social smoking’ as they called it . This seemed like the kind of situation where it warranted one.

Matthew was correct. Gil held out a hand, eyes flickering briefly toward the blonde. “Give me yours, I don’t wanna light one while I’m driving” Matthew passed it over, and lit another for himself. 

Soon, even with the windows down, the car was smokey. All parties looking in different directions, not saying a damn word. It was driving Matthew crazy… The apartment was a forty minute drive in this traffic! “How was work?” Matthew asked idly as he stared out the window as the people on the sidewalks. 

“Not too exciting. New guy had some issues…” he shrugged “But you know how it is.” 

Matthew hummed in agreement and that was that for conversation. No one wanting to address the elephant in the car. It was only five minutes of silence before the radio went on so they could all ignore each other in some semblance of comfort.

\----

Sitting in the living room, it turning out, wasn’t much better for comfort. 

Arthur had followed the two up the flight of stairs to Matthews second floor apartment, eyes looking critically over everything. He had come into the apartment looking startled as he took it in. 

Gilbert was the first one the couch. Plunking down with a groan. Matthew taking the spot next to him, leaving a chair open for Arthur. They sat in silence and Matthew was just considering how many times he’d have to bang his head on the wall before he passed out when Arthur cleared his throat inspiring an idea.

Matthew bounced up. “Anyone want anything? Coffee? water? food?” He walked towards the open concept kitchen, putting a counter between him and the two who were following him with their eyes. 

“I’ll take tea if you have any.” Arthur said sounding thankful. Matthew nodded and hopped to kneel on the counter so he could reach the seldom used tea pot. 

Gilbert stood casting a weary look at Arthur. Matthew hopped down and gave a small smile as arms wrapped around his middle, chin resting on his shoulder “Do you want me to stay or go?” he murmured there. Matthew could tell by the tightening of his arms and the tone of his voice Gil was not really for the whole ‘going’ Idea. Leaving all together he guessed was out of the question. 

Matthew craned his head looking at the tired looking man who was half leaning on him “Why don’t you go lay down in bed? You’ve been up all night.” As if on cue, Gilbert yawned. 

“You sure you’ll be okay?”

Interesting question. At least now he was high rather than hitting withdrawal, so he didn’t hurt, his brain was a bit numb, that could help and hinder. He was aware that this was probably about to turn into some sort of war of words as well… Gilbert was great about keeping his mouth shut during those. 

“ I’ll handle it.” He said finally. 

“I suppose it would be in bad taste to make a joke about kidnapping you to take to bed right now wouldn’t it?” he half whispered in Matthews ear causing the blonde to laugh

“Yeah, probably” 

With a final kiss, Gilbert pulled back. “Night Birdie.” 

Matthew bid him goodnight and turned back to his work, he filled the kettle with water and placed it on the burner to boil before reluctantly turning back to the living room. 

He had barely sat down before Arthur started 

“I want you to come back to New York with me” He said simply as he leaned forward in the chair. 

Matthews hands went to his face scrubbing his eyes. “No” it came out almost sleepily, like a kid refusing to take a nap. 

“Why bloody not?” Arthur snapped. 

Matthew lowered his hands from his eyes and stared for a second. He was assessing how to handle that question without coming off as a complete ass. "You’re asking me to leave my home, my friends and the scrape of stability I’ve built… Did you even consider I like my life?” It wasn’t a complete lie. Sure, his job could be taxing at times, but it paid well, most the clients were nice enough, and he was _good_ at it. 

Unbidden his mind wandered to the man down the hall and currently in his bed. He shook it away. He wasn’t leaving, so there was no reason to even have to consider what would happen there. 

“So you’d rather be a whore then come home?” Arthur tried to sound harsh, he did sound kinda pissed, but mostly the cracking in his voice just came off as hurt. Shit. 

“Why do you want me to come home? What on earth would I even do Arthur? Not like Alfred exactly sent me off to school with a paper bag lunch everyday. I’ve never even set foot in a high school, I have no marketable skills, and no real interest in being a freeloader for the rest of my life.”

“You could work for me. We could always use some proofreaders”

“okay… except I can’t read very well and know little to nothing about grammar.” 

“My assistant then!”

Matthew sighed and put his head in his hands rushing, “I don’t know how to work a computer- look, My skills literally extend to dancing on a pole, or being on my back.” He ignored the flinch and continued with the glimmer of dark humour “So unless your publishing firm wants an on call stripper for employee perks...” Plus how would I be able to get my fix if i had to focus on work and constantly under your watch. “That might make the break room a little awkward for you though.” 

“Matthew… Please… “ 

“Could we discuss this later? I’ve been up for a while, I have work tonight and I’d really like to get some sleep.” Matthew stood, 

“You’re not going back to that place-”

“There’s blankets in the hall closet if you want to sleep.” He stretched as he spoke, and started walking slowly towards the hall "The TV is there, password for netflix is ‘Maple’ with a capital ‘M’. Plenty of food in the fridge. I should be up by around two” 

 

“Matthew-”

“Good night Arthur” He said as he disappeared down the hall and slipped into his bedroom. 

Matthew moved to the edge of the bed, stripping out of his shirt and shorts and crawling beneath the sheets and over to Gilbert's warm chest. He sighed, relaxing as familiar arms wrapped around him and he let his eyes close drifting into…

“Hey Birdie?”

Dammit…he groaned “Yeah Gil?” he couldn’t bring himself to open his eyes, instead snuggling closer, enjoying the way his arms responded pulled him closer.

“You should go home…”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kind of a short chapter... but its a chapter none-the-less! 
> 
> and one with a roller coaster of feels... just so your aware.

“I am home.” he grumbled, purposefully ignoring the real meaning. 

“No, home with your dad” 

Matthews eyes opened for that. He pulled away sitting up and turning narrowed eyes to his… whatever the hell he was... “You _want_ me to leave?” 

Gilbert moved to put a hand up to Matthew’s face, but Matthew pulled away. The thought stung more than he expected… Gilbert frowned, his eyes were sad, “It’s not that I want you to leave…. but… It’s your family Birdie”

“No, It’s someone I’m related to. He’s not my family.” Matthew snapped louder, he didn’t give a shit if Arthur heard him

Gilberts still looked sad, but slightly serious as well, “Why isn’t he? What did he do not to be?”

What was with all the fucking questions?! He was pissed… more pissed than he expected because the question was a valid one. but it was not one he wanted to get into now! and not with Gilbert being the one to bring it up!

He turned his head away, “Get out.” he said harshly and quietly

“Matthew, please just-” he tried reaching out and putting a hand on Matthew's shoulder.

“Get out! you don’t fucking want me to be here, than you can just get the fuck out now!” He stood , yanking on a pair of sweatpants and walking to grab Gilbert clothing leaving the room with them, The albino followed him, wearing only boxers, as Matthew ignored the startled look Arthur gave him. 

“Matthew please, just calm down okay? Just, lets talk about this” Gilbert pleaded, following behind him. 

Matthew ignored him to. He didn’t want to talk about any of this He swooped to gather Gilbert's shoes, opening the front door and throwing all of it out into the hall. “Come on Birdy… be reasonable, I just think you should think about it! of course I don’t _want_ you to go…” 

Matthew spun and snapped “If you didn’t _want_ me to go then you wouldn’t even fucking suggest it would you!?” 

Gilbert’s mouth opened like he was going to say something, but he closed it when he glance over at Arthur. his eyes went back to Matthew, desperately pleading for understanding and patience, but Matthew had none to give. 

“Whatever, not like this fucking matters right?! Just a way to get through the job for you. I’m sure the new guy will do just as good of a job.” he said looking purposefully away working to make his voice uninterested and hide the hurt that lingers beneath the statement

“What the hell are you talking about! You think that’s all this was for?!” Gilbert’s voice was filled with anger and hurt but Matthew ignored him standing with the door in hand 

“Either you fucking get out of my apartment now or I will, and I can’t guarantee I’ll come back if i do” he snarled. 

“Matthew…” Arthur’s voice broke through and without even looking Matthew snapped at him

“You stay the fuck out of it Arthur, you’ve fucked up enough already!” His chest was heaving and his head was spinning. 

“All right birdie… I’m going…” Gilbert said sighing deeply. Matthew stared at the floor as the defeated man walked out. Matthew shut the door behind him. leaning against the wood, suddenly feeling very tired. he swallowed as tears started spilling over, lost in all the emotions swirling in his head. 

Then the couch creaked, and anger bubbled over sadness. as turned on his heel staring down the man on the couch, who as Gilbert had said, did nothing wrong. He knew it and yet he was still to anger to stop himself

“This is all your fault! You and your goddamned son! I was _fine_ I was _happy_! Then you two have to fucking show up and ruin it for me!” his voice caught, tears still flowing although he gave them no okay to!

“Matthew I never meant to-” Arthur started standing slowly, putting the tea down he had finished making himself.

“No! No just… just stop. Alright..” he was burning out, all his anger spent. He’d never been one to hang onto rage very long, snark sure, but not intense anger… That’s probably how Alfred kept worming his way in. “I’m going to bed… I just… I need to sleep.” The reality of that statement was really sinking in… 

“I’m sorry lad…” Arthur said quietly as Matthew walked from the room.

He got back to his bed, looking at the messed up sheets, and suddenly felt like shit… Absolute shit... He was upset about fighting with Gilbert and now all he wanted was to curl up in his arms and cry about it. How selfish could he be?! Gilbert didn’t even have a fucking car… fuck… god he was an asshole. He had to try and catch him… 

He moved back out of the room, yanking a shirt on, Arthur’s neck must have started to hurt with the amount of whipping around he had been doing… “I’ll be back” Matthew shouted as he tore out the door and flew down the steps, ignoring whatever Arthur called after him. He was still hurt, the sting of abandonment echoing, but maybe he had overreacted… 

Luck apparently was on his side as he got out into the parking lot, Gilbert was still in the parking lot on the phone. “Gilbert wait!” Matthew shouted causing the other to stop, but he didn’t turn. Matthew jogged to him. 

“Yeah, I’ll call you back in a sec west… Yeah I’m fine dummkopf…. okay bye” the phone clicked off and Gilbert sighed.

“Gil, I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have yelled or said that shit, I just… I don’t know…” Gilbert nodded, still not turning and silence hung for a moment 

“Hey Birdie..” Gilbert finally spoke “What is this thing between us to you? Is it just because of work, or…” 

Oh he did not want to have this conversation. Not in the middle of a parking lot, not when he’d been up for this long, and certainly not when he was stung over the thought that Gilbert didn’t want him around… looking into feelings was only going to hurt more. 

But he wasn’t exactly being given a choice. 

“I don’t know what it is Gil. It’s not the kind of thing I think about.” he said looking at the ground. continuing in a whisper, “but It hurt hearing you tell me to leave…” 

Gilbert spun around, mouth turned down in a scowl. “I told you. I don’t want you to leave.” He snapped. Matthew’s eyes were still glued down and Gilbert sighed cursing under his breath “I said it because I want you to have a better life than this…” 

Matthew’s frown deepened and he was about to argue there was nothing wrong with his life when Gilbert caught his chin bringing it up to look him in the eyes. He was serious, but there was sadness etched on his face “But the thought of you leaving hurts like a son of a bitch Matthew…” 

Matthew’s breath caught and he swallowed hard, eyes embarrassingly getting moist. “It hurts me too….” he whispered, his voice broken. “I don’t wanna leave you” admitting it only made his chest ache more.

It was Gilbert's turn to look breathless and heart broken, “I don’t want you to just stay for me. I don’t want to be the reason you wind up like this...” his hand moved to brush Matthews shirt to the side revealing the shadow of a bruise “or worse” his fingers ghosted over Matthew’s neck where Ivan routinely squeezed enough to render him unconscious… "Do you have any idea how much I hate seeing you like that? I'd rather you leave and be safe, then have you not be okay one night..."

Matthew, felt an overwhelming tightness in his chest, emotion overflowing... but he couldn’t process all this right now. he was exhausted, his body hurt and his head was spinning and most of all, he was not good with handling emotions like this. He was shaking as he moved forward clinging to Gilbert's shirt and burying his face against the others chest. he felt arms wrap reluctantly around him before they squeezed tight. After a few minutes of calming himself, Matthew spoke, his words slightly muffled, “I’m tired… will you come back upstairs with me?” 

Gilbert was silent for a minute and Matthew was waiting for a no when he spoke, “yeah… yeah i can come back up.” 

“thank you” 

The pair made their way back up the stairs, dragging themselves pasted Arthur again, and fell into bed. Matthew clung to Gilbert curling in on him closer then he even usually did. even with everything sorted, he was scared he was going to wake up and Gilbert would be gone… Alfred had said he wanted him around and left too… he didn’t have long to think on it as he fell asleep almost the instant Gilbert's fingers started running through his hair.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I FINALLY FINISHED IT GUYS!   
> sorry that took do long... god... 
> 
> Either way, this then the epilouge both goin up now!

It was five hours later that the pair woke. both dressed, Matthew watching Gilbert as the Albino pulled clothing for the day out of his drawer in Matthew’s dresser. If he left, what on earth would he put there now? He couldn’t see being able to put anything else in that drawer. Maybe… Maybe if he left he would leave the dresser behind? 

No. No because he wasn’t leaving. He couldn’t leave Gil and… He grabbed the bottle of pills shaking two out, he’d never be able to hack it without these.. finding a new dealer was hard and it could be so dangerous… New York didn’t seem like the safest place to do it either. 

he tossed the pills back into the bottle, pulling on his own clothing. He needed to have a steady conversation. He’d be fine for a few more hours anyway. 

They made their way to the living room, Gilbert busied himself making coffee as Matthew sat down on the chair across from Arthur again. “I can’t go with you Arthur” Matthew says simply. not beating around the bush. 

Like a broken record the conversation started again, “Why not Matthew?” 

“I like it here. I don’t want to leave my life.” 

“It’s not a safe life Matthew!” Arthur said with a deep scowl. Matthew sighed in response, sure… it wasn’t exactly safe, but he was fine! He had plenty to live on, he was never hurt too badly and he was use to it… but saying any of that wouldn’t help Arthur get over this, so… 

“I won’t run, you can visit whenever. I can call and such… I mean that should be good if all you want is to know me right? kids live away from their parents all the time.” but not after running off with their Pedo big bro and leaving daddy high and dry for like.. a decade… 

“And leave you here to continue on in the shamble your brother left you in?! No Matthew you have to see reason… I can help you get schooling, we can get you a job!” 

“I don’t want to be suffocated Arthur… besides” he tossed in eyes sliding to the kitchen watching as Gilbert pretended not to listen “I can’t leave him…” 

“well from what i saw this morning, he doesn’t want you stuck in this either.” Arthur sighed “I could help you rent an apartment back home. I could, ” he paused, looking over to the Kitchen where Matthew was still throwing glances “ I could bring him out too. if that get’s you out of here, I’d be happy too.”

Matthew furrowed his brows, eyes stuck on Gilbert who had paused. Matthew voice caught “Well.. I.. I um…” 

Suddenly Gilbert came out, coffee in hand rolling his eyes as he handed the mug to the still stuck blonde. “if you’re gonna ask me to come out, I will obviously.” Gilbert said taking a seat next to Arthur. It was appropriate. two against one… 

“And what about Ludwig?!” Matthew said suddenly. trying not to sound pleased with himself for the solution. Gilbert had run off to save his brother, he wouldn’t just abandon right?!

“west is only there because I am” He said shrugging. “He’s had job offers, but he won’t take them if it means leaving me there. Some debt bullshit. It’d be good for him too Birdie.” 

Matthew frowned, well that lifeline was gone… “w-well what if I just like it here? The west coast is warmer and…” he trailed off noting that Gilbert was staring at his shaking hand. How long had they slept? Already shaking… 

Gilbert gave him a look mixed between determination and apology. “He doesn’t want to leave because he can’t take his dealer with him.” he turned to Arthur “He’s on Vicodin. Has been for years now.” He turned back to Matthew flinching a bit “sorry Birdie, but…” he trailed off with a shrug

Matthew’s eyes were opened wide, how… how could he?! Matthew wanted to yell, deny it and kick his ass out of this damn apartment- but he’d already done that once in the past twenty-four hours… damnit! He really didn’t want a repeat of being an ass. so instead he scowled at the ground, refusing to look at his father, existing in the awkward silence that hung.

It was a brief time, that felt like forever to Matthew, before Arthur spoke “ Well we can get you help for that too” He said determinedly, though there was a small quiver to his words. Matthew raised his head to gage the other reaction when he noticed Arthurs eyes were now narrowed on Gilbert. “And are you on anything?” 

Gilbert looked like he was about to answer calmly, but Matthew didn’t “Yes he’s clean” He snapped, drawing surprised looks, “He has a hell of a lot less to be judged for than I do, So if you expect me to even consider this, you can lay off the fucking looks and comments now Arthur” He snarled. “I’m not bringing him out there so he can deal with that bullshit.” 

Arthur nodded, and Gilbert gave a tiny smirk, though his eyes were a bit sad. Now they were both staring at him… waiting for an answer. One he didn’t exactly have yet.

“I need to clear my head a bit… think it over..” He said getting up. Gilbert got up as well before Matthew turned to him and held a hand up “Alone…” He received to suspitious looks and he rolls his eyes “i’m not running anywhere. here.” He walked over to his keys, tossing them to the Albino “Just don’t lock me out. I won’t get far without a car right?” Neither man looked thrilled but they didn’t object further as Matthew grabbed a coat, shoving feet in his shoes as he left the house. 

Matthew wandered the busy street, it was four pm, so normal shift workers were getting off, college students coming out of school heading home or shopping… Would he be like that soon? If he went to newyork. Would he get out of school and head back to an apartment? go to work and get off to take a bus home? oh shit what about his car? If he went he doubted Arthur would trust him to _drive_ back alone… but He was not excited about the idea of a road trip with pops across the country. 

So now he was going to cling to his car? He was sure it could be moved with the rest of his stuff… he’d go a few days without his stuff and he and Gilbert would be fine. They could buy bed stuff and sleep on the floor or something. It wouldn’t be the first time… 

Was he gonna do this then? Was he okay with any of this? His whole life had been chaos, he finally gets it settled and he’s gonna uproot again, get dragged across country again. His head hurt and he sighed. pretty soon he was just going to run away. Go live in Canada, honestly he’d seen enough of the continental U.S… 

His thought process and self pity was cut off by a loud ringing in his pocket. Oh… he’d brought his phone. He was gonna need to change that around too wasn’t he? He took it out and answered, still half in thought and not bothering to look at the caller ID. 

“Hello?”

“Heya Mattie!”

Matthew’s scowl came back “What do you want Alfred?” He asked acidly.

“Well, that’s a nice way to greet your big brother. When I called to forgive for the thing with Peter and everything!” Matthew was stunned… _forgive_?! what was he on?! “Kid was probably more trouble than he was worth anyway. No one hold a candle to you Mattie.” 

Matthew had stopped walking at this point, anger bubbling. The stress of everything, the fact that this, all of this was Alfred stupid selfish god damned fault exploded. “ _you_ forgive _me_?! That is rich Alfred! Do you have any idea how much you fucked shit up for me in the past forty-eight hours?! No no you fucking don’t cause you only think of yourself you piece of absolute trash!” 

“Whoa whoa kid, calm do-”

“No! don’t you fucking ‘kid’ me! I’m not a kid anymore remember?! I stopped being a kid when you dumped me at a fucking whore house and fucked off!” People were stopping and staring, but he didn’t give a shit. He did, however, move out of the middle of the sidewalk, standing in front of a fountain in front of an office building instead. “‘no one holds a candle to you’ why?! because i came _willingly_? because you can still get shit off of me?! or is that just what you say to all of us Al?!” 

“Mattie, you need to chill dude… seriously… haven’t we got past this shit yet?” 

“ Get past it?! Are you High?! You fucked up my whole childhood, then my life, and now fucking Arthur is here trying to play dad and make things better because my life is _so_ fucked, and you want me to just _get past_ all the shit?!”

“Whoa whoa… Dad’s there?!” Alfred sounded genuinely shocked

“Yes, all thanks to you again! fucking shocking! I get settled and Alfred shows up and fucks things up again! you know what?! Stay the fuck away from me. I’m done with this bullshit. If i ever see your face again, I’ll kill you myself” He snarled 

“Mattie what the f-” Click. 

Matthew hung up the phone, growling out loud as he turned chucking the phone as hard as he could against the stone of the waterfall fountain, bits and pieces of the device scattering and splashing into the water. Well, that made getting a new phone easier… 

He quickly found tears rushing to his eyes, frustration, anger and confusion all taking him quickly. He moved, sitting on the side of the fountain, his head dropping between his knees as he tried to breath. He couldn’t do this shit anymore… none of it… He couldn’t pretend he was okay, that his life was put together, because it wasn’t. He was a runaway, ex-pedo toy turned whore, addicted to pills, who was fucking having a mental break down six blocks from home where he left his dad and his… He couldn’t even _think_ boyfriend without a mental block!

Matthew got up with a snarl. headed back the way he came, working to calm himself as he went. 

When he reached his apartment, he had finally stopped crying. His face he was sure was probably stained, nose red, and his eyes swollen, but he went in anyway. 

It was kind of comical in a way, when he came in, both men stood looking at his with nervousness and expectation. he had to fight back the urge to say ‘congratulations it’s a girl!’ Instead he close the door, tok of his shoes and hung up his coat, all with the eyes watching him, waiting. 

Matthew moved to stand in the living room, looking over both of them before looking down, emotion he’d just got under control bubbled up again and he took a stuttering breath, Gilbert beside him in an instant, arms around him, Matthew clinging again as he cried 

“It’s okay Birdie, what’s wrong?” 

Matthew looked over Gilbert shoulder towards Arthur, he took another shaky breath before sobbing, “I’m ready to go h-home.”


	12. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the epilogue, I posted another chapter today before this! So, make sure your not just reading this one!

Matthew woke up and groaned as the sunlight hit his face. 

“Birdie, get up” 

“no”

“Come on Matthew, up” 

“no~” He pulled the blankets up over his head 

“You have class in an hour.” 

“I’m not goin’ s’to cold” He grumbled. 

“Like hell you’re not” he said before yanking the blankets off

“no!” Matthew whined. 

“come on, it’s not that bad out… it’s going up to 56 degrees today” 

“It’s September! It’s suppose to be warmer!” he argued but sat up, accepting the coffee Gilbert held out. 

“Not here it’s not.” Gilbert said with a smile. 

Matthew grumbled, taking a sip of the coffee. He looked over the rim at Gilbert, he looked tired and Matthew felt bad.. They had moved to new york eight months ago, finding a modest apartment not far from Arthur, Matthew had tried to say he’d pay his own rent with his savings, but honestly, after seeing the amount… he didn’t argue too much when Arthur insisted. 

His first stop in the big apple of course wasn’t actually in the big apple, They had gone straight from the airport, out of the city and to a quiet rehab centre in the country. It had been hell, pure hell. three months in the facility, another three being watched closely but his sponsor… yeah, fantastic. But, at least he was clean now. 

During his time away, Gilbert had taken a bar tending course, insisting on paying for it himself. Arthur had tried to insist again, but Gilbert drew the line at free rent. The course was quick and with Arthur’s connections he wound up with a good job pretty quickly. 

Matthew had started with a tutor to get his GED while he was still in facility, something to help him catch up. His math actually wasn’t too bad, years of calculating tips, and doing budgeting…. within the five months of daily lessons that left his brain melting, he took the test and passed. 

After that Arthur had wasted no time getting him into Administrative classes, which he started today, insisting his charm would come in handy. He’d work for Arthur directly once he’d graduated, his own personal secretary. It felt a bit like cheating really, Arthur was high up in some publishing company. He was sure there were more qualified applicants, but he wasn’t about to turn down a good paying job. Especially not when Arthur beamed at his acceptance. 

His father had been overjoyed with his homecoming, trying to make everything comfortable. He had come out to visit the rehab with Gilbert every family weekend, sending whatever he was allowed. It felt a bit like he was trying to make up for the years, but Matthew let him. After he had adjusted to the idea, and had some therapy at the centre, he had started feeling more guilty. He had let Arthur suffer all those years, so he wasn’t about to argue about Sunday dinners (even if he did fear for his life while eating Arthur’s cooking) and had started calling him ‘Dad’ out loud without any sarcasm or discomfort to it. 

That wasn’t the only good news. although, no matter how much therapy, and how many times he repeated it was a good thing, Matthew couldn’t help but feel a little sad to see when Alfred had been caught… not just caught normally either, No no.. He had been caught on ‘to catch a predator’ completely trashed. 

It had caused a bit of a media stir, Prompting more attention to be shone on the Return of Alfred’s first victim. But at least Alfie couldn’t hurt anyone else… Arthur had even been kind enough to arrange therapy for him while he was in there. Matthew suspected he felt a little responsible, unleashing Alfred onto the world by kicking him out rather than going for therapy right off the bat. 

Either way, it was just another part of his life that was wrapped up. 

really, it felt like that should have been enough… but no. 

“Matthew, I will carry you into that shower if I have too” Gilbert said. Matthew pouted for a second before a smirk lit his face

“and here I thought you didn’t want me to be late” He said raising an eyebrow and getting an answering smirk. 

He had to move to put the coffee on the side table Gilbert crawling across the bed towards him suddenly. Matthew laid back again as the Albino was hovering over him, dipping down to hover in front of his lips, “You have a one track mind these days….” He murmured kissing him

“Oh and you don’t?” Matthew replied, pulling away long enough to say so. After rehab, Matthew had found himself unexpectedly pent up.. It had taken some time to get use to the idea, for both of them, but eventually when sex no longer meant work, it started to flow a little easier. They still caught themselves acting out of habit once in awhile, but it was a work in progress

“Well…” Gilbert purred moving to kiss Matthews neck, drawing a light groan “Can you blame me?” 

Matthews nails ran over his sides, “nope” He whispered.

“mmm… All the things I’m gonna do to you…

“Oh yeah?”

“Yup… so many things Birdie… I’m gonna make you scream for me” 

“No objections here” 

“Good… “ He said, nipping before standing up “Than get to class and we’ll get that started when you get home yeah?”

Matthew’s jaw dropped as he watched Gilbert smirk and walk out of the room. “that’s not fair!” He shouted

“Life's not fair toots!” Gilbert shouted back, the shower turning on. 

Matthew sighed but smiled. Life wasn’t always fair… sometimes it sucked… sometimes it felt fucking impossible. He got out of the bed, walking out of their bedroom, slipping into the bathroom, stripping down to join the Albino, giving him a cheeky smile before kissing him. But sometimes, life got better. Sometimes, despite how fucked up it was, life could be wonderful again.


End file.
